Have you ever wondered if you were doing enough to make your husband feel appreciated, special, and loved? He may already feel that way, but there are certain things you can do to make sure he does.
Feeling appreciated and expressing gratitude are important parts of the recipe for a happy marriage. We all like feeling loved, and it makes us want to reciprocate those feelings. In fact, at least one study shows that feeling appreciated and believing that your spouse values you will directly impact the way you feel about your marriage. It also influences commitment and trust in the lasting connection.
Still, you may wonder, “Why don’t I know how to make my husband feel loved and appreciated?” That’s why we curated this list of 11 ways to make your husband feel appreciated. While your husband may be grateful for some of these more than others, you are likely to find at least a few that work for your marriage.
Spend Time With Him
Okay, so this one may be pretty obvious, and you may be thinking, “I already spend time with my husband.” However, it is more than just spending time with him. It is spending time with him doing things that he enjoys doing, even when you don’t enjoy them. Showing that you are interested in him and his hobbies can be a great way to make him feel like you love him and care about the things he is doing.
So next time he is watching a football game, fixing drywall, or practicing his golf swing, go out and be there with him. You can even try to get into it yourself and form a connection that you never had before. He will feel loved, excited, and happy that you want to share interests with him and spend time doing the things he loves. Who knows, he may even invite you to join him every week!
You can also hold his hand, touch his leg, or kiss him more often while spending time with each other. Physical touch is important in any relationship and can reduce stress, promote better bonds, encourage well-being, and limit feelings of loneliness and isolation. Even if it is just a little pat on the shoulder as you walk past each other or a high five while you are watching the football game we talked about, the physical touch can make him feel loved.
Stick Up For Him
You and your husband are a team, and it can make him feel loved when you stick up for him or defend him. It doesn’t have to be anything huge, but just letting someone know that you are on his side can make him feel respected and grateful for having you in his life. For example, if someone is being rude or impolite to him, defend him and let him know that you are always there for him.
This may not happen all the time, but it can be an easy way to let him know that you will stand up for him no matter what. If you have children, even the small things they do can be hurtful, and you can defend them as well. If your child says something rude or disrespectful, your husband may just ignore it, but standing up for him during these times not only teaches your child an important lesson but also lets your husband know that you care for his feelings.
You could also brag about your husband to his friends to let them know how important he is to you without going the traditional route of telling him. Additionally, try to avoid correcting your husband in public. If there is something you disagree with, do it in private. This can make a huge difference for his pride and subtly let him know that you consider his feelings.
When your husband is getting ready for work or about to lay down in bed, it can brighten his mood and make him feel appreciated when he finds a short note expressing love and gratitude. Because of how simple it is to leave these types of notes anywhere at any time, this is an easy way to make your husband feel good about himself and your relationship. You may even find it fun to play note tag where you and your husband switch back and forth who is leaving the note.
You can even write an entire letter and mail it to him. Most husbands don’t get letters, at least not in our modern world, but it can be an enjoyable experience and something that he will remember forever. There is a good chance he will also want to write you a letter in return as well.
You can also compliment him for no reason other than he deserves it, and you want to express your love. Tell him that you like his outfit or the way that he does chores. Anything that shows him you notice him and the things that he does. Plus, research shows that it will not only make your husband feel better but can improve your mood as well! People, including your husband, prefer compliments about personality or skills, but saying nice words about anything could make him just a little happier.
Show Interest in his Work
Your husband goes to work and comes home with money to support you and your family, even if you work just as hard. Just telling him that you appreciate the hard work he does can go a long way toward him feeling cared for and loved. But you can take it a step further by showing some interest in his work. You can do this in a couple of ways.
The first is simply to ask about his days and weeks and do so sincerely. Truly care and converse about what he does every day at work. Instead of just saying, “How was work?” and getting a bland response, try to ask open-ended questions and follow up with additional concerns. This ensures that he knows you aren’t just asking out of habit and that you actually want to know about his working life.
The next option is to show interest in what he does for a living. Ask him how the job works and learn why it is important that the work gets done. It can be so easy to separate your working husband from the husband you love, but his work is part of his life and well-being, so it can be great to show him how much you care.
Cook His Favorite Meal
Making a delicious dinner that your husband enjoys can make him feel appreciated, but when you cook his favorite meal, that makes him know that you care about what he enjoys. If you’re looking for ways to make your husband feel loved and appreciated, then this is one of the best.
Several surveys actually show how important food is in relationships and for mood. Eating also creates moments for bonding, and a lot of people have a boost in outlook and mood just by cooking for someone else. Cooking him a meal fills his heart and his stomach, and a meal made with love is the best type of meal.
If you want to get extra creative, learn a recipe similar to a meal your husband loves from a restaurant you visited. This will show him even greater appreciation, regardless of whether it is as good as the original version or not. You can even ask him if he wants to help you cook it, which is a great new experience you can have with him as well.
Sex is a crucial part of any loving relationship, but sometimes it can be easy to get into roles and routines. However, initiating intimacy and bedroom activities can show your husband that you care in a different way than other options on this list. It can make him feel attractive and loved for who he is.
When the man is always initiating, it may cause him to feel like you don’t truly enjoy intimacy as much as he does or that you just do it because he wants you to.
In addition to starting the fun yourself, you can also try new things that he likes in the bedroom, as long as you are comfortable with them. Creating a passionate environment together can be exciting and allow you to show appreciation for each other in a way that you never have before. Never disregard the importance of sex when it comes to gratitude in your relationship.
Ask for His Opinion
Your husband may like knowing that you value what he thinks. Next time you are making a personal decision or talking with someone about disagreeing opinions, ask your husband what he thinks. Even if it is something that he is usually not involved with, doing so can let him know that your opinion matters to you in every aspect of life.
If you are having trouble with a problem, you can ask him for help as well. His advice could help you navigate toward a solution in addition to making him feel more appreciated and valued. Plus, this gives an opportunity for teamwork that can create a stronger connection in your partnership. There is a chance he will enjoy the chance to help you out or offer his view on something. Even if he doesn’t offer advice, he will probably feel appreciated that you asked for his opinion anyway.
Give Him a Gift
Men like being spoiled and adored. Just getting him a small gift can make your husband feel just that way. It doesn’t have to be anything expensive or extravagant, as long as it makes him feel special. Both giving and getting gifts can be good for your well-being, but gifts with emotional significance can also strengthen relationships, which is a great benefit to showing simple appreciation for your man.
If you don’t have the money to spare, a present that you make yourself can be just as good, or even more so. You can create some artwork, make something that your hubby can use at work or for one of his hobbies, or write a poem or song that tells him how much you love and care about him. Regardless of what you choose to give your husband, there is a good chance he will love it and adore you for being so nice.
Plan a Date
Planning a date all on your own so that you can surprise your husband is one of the best ways to make your husband feel appreciated. You can craft date ideas based on his interests as well, which can show that you care about his enjoyment of your time together. If your husband doesn’t feel appreciated often, this is sure to make him feel happy and loved.
If you take care of everything associated with the date, it will also give him time to enjoy himself and your company. This may help him destress and focus on living in the moment more than when he takes care of most aspects of a night out as a couple. If you don’t like the idea of planning everything, then you can still let your husband know you care by letting him choose where to eat, what to do, or when to do it based on his own preferences.
Let Him Have a Free Day
What do I mean by a free day? Well, most days, even on weekends, men are busy and have chores, responsibilities, and plans. However, if you have the ability to give him a day off to do whatever he wants, or at least part of a day, your husband would probably greatly appreciate it. He would be able to enjoy his alone time or his time with you, depending on your daily engagements and errands, without worrying about everything he needs to get done.
If you can take on all the responsibility on a Saturday to give him time to reduce his workload and stress levels, then he may be happier the rest of the week and be able to return the favor by treating you to some conveniences. Just one day is all many men need to recuperate, but they may not take that time off of work and personal responsibilities on their own, and this can be the great appreciative nudge your husband needs to finally get some rest.
Take Care of Yourself
I know this sounds counterproductive, but a husband wants to care for his wife and make her happy. Therefore, taking care of yourself means he is actually getting what he wants and can make him feel appreciated indirectly because he knows he is doing whatever he can to give you the life you want to lead. Who knew pampering yourself could be so selfless?
So make sure you are eating healthy foods, relaxing when you get a chance, smiling, and exercising. All of these things will also make you feel better so that you can tackle some of the other options on this list. Plus, when you smile at your man, it makes both of you just a little bit happier, according to several studies.
Tips to Improve Gratitude in Marriage
While the ideas on this list are great ways to make your husband feel appreciated, there are other things you can do to improve gratitude in your marriage overall. Let’s examine a few of these methods that may make you both feel more appreciated and expressive of the things that you are grateful for.
There is something you and your husband can both do together, and it is called a thankful calendar. It is a normal calendar, but instead of writing events on the days as they go by, you write down something you are thankful for. Writing things that you appreciate about your husband and allowing him to do the same can grow these feelings and allow you to inspect the ways that you care.
You may find that you are thankful for more than you ever realized before, and the same goes for your husband. It can be hard to think of all the things your husband does that you are grateful for, but when you write one down each and every day, you discover this while letting him know at the same time. Then, at the end of the year, you can go back together and look through the entire year of gratitude.
This is similar to the thankful calendar but is more individualized and private. You can also get more detailed about each thing you are grateful for when you write them down in a journal. Each day, or even every two days, if you are afraid you don’t have time every day, write about something your husband does that you are grateful for. It can be something he did on that day, but it could be anything else as well.
Did you know that expressing gratitude can drastically improve your well-being and happiness? Doing so often can promote optimism and alter your perspective to see the positive aspects of even the most negative events. You will be more content with what you have in your marriage and in other facets of life when you spend time feeling thankful for the best part of your livelihood.
Being more responsive and communicating openly and honestly can also help to develop better gratitude in your marriage. It will allow you to express your gratitude better verbally, of course, but it will also allow you to nonverbally and indirectly show your husband that you care for the things they do.
One tip for improving communication easily is to use “I” statements instead of “You” statements. This method is often used for disagreements and arguments because it lets you communicate the way that you feel instead of placing the blame on your spouse. However, it can also be a good rule during other times to make your husband feel more appreciated because it communicates that the feelings of appreciation are coming straight from you in an active way.
For example, instead of saying, “You are wonderful for working so hard for us every day,” you can say, “I really respect your hard work and appreciate the way you care for our family.” This communicates your own feelings instead of displacing them from yourself.
It’s the Little Things
While it is great to choose one or more of the ways to make my husband feel appreciated, it is also important to do all the small things that make him feel that way on a daily basis. Things like saying thank you for everything he does, and meaning it, can make him feel like you understand that he is doing what it takes for your relationship and family. Even if it is something he does every day, like clean up the dishes after dinner or watch the kids while you check your emails, let him know that you are grateful.
Not only that, but there are plenty of small ways to make him feel appreciated and loved. You can let him choose what television show you watch, sleep in an extra 30 minutes on weekends, or allow him to get his dinner first (only sometimes, of course!) can all express your gratitude for your husband.
Making your husband feel appreciated doesn’t have to be difficult, but sometimes you want to do something you never thought about before. We hope this list of ways to make your husband feel loved and appreciated is a helpful tool moving forward. Let us know if you have any other ideas that you do for your partner in the comments below.