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17 Signs She Doesn’t Love You Anymore

You see the signs she does not love you anymore, but you are full of doubts. You are in denial because there is a memory of great times together.

Do you dream about the days when your partner was happy, eager to see you, and passionate?

The two of you were blissfully happy and madly in love. Now, it seems like you’re doing all the work to sustain your relationship – and she doesn’t seem to care anymore.

People fall in and out of love with each other throughout relationships because so many variables and conditions affect romantic connections.

It takes commitment, hard work, time, effort, nurturing, and attention. Love alone isn’t enough to sustain a relationship.

There’s no getting around the fact that people do fall out of love with each other. It’s painful when it happens. You wouldn’t wish that kind of emotional pain or trauma on to your worst enemy.

What happens with your emotions when you see the signs she does not love you anymore

Because it’s common, the best you can do if it happens to you is move on with your life. But you don’t have to sit around and wait for your girl to dump you!

The earlier you can spot problems in your relationship and signs she is no longer in love with you, the easier it will be for you to move on from the relationship.

If you can identify early signs of your partner falling out of love with you, you can be proactive and decide what you need to do.

Whether she’s your girlfriend or your wife, life can become bleak if she stops loving you. You might feel depressed, anxious, or uneasy.

You might not know what to do and be unsure if she has fallen out of love with you. The more she pulls away, the tighter you might be holding on. Perhaps you’re asking yourself the following questions:

  • What did I do to make her fall out of love with me?
  • Is she seeing another guy?
  • Is this all in my head, or is our relationship in trouble?
  • Am I trying too hard and making her pull away even more?
  • Is there still a chance to patch things up?
  • Did she ever love me?

You’ll be relieved to know there are definite signs to look out for that you are no longer the love of her life. Most important: trust your instincts – they are rarely wrong.

17 signs to look out for to know if she is no longer in love with you!

1. Communication Just Isn’t Happening

Sign of a woman not loving anymore. Woman Ignoring Man
If she seems to be tuning you out when you express your feelings and concerns, she may no longer be in love with you.

Perhaps your partner has stopped talking to you – about anything.

Does she seem to shut down and utterly uninterested in talking to you?

She might respond to your questions but offer nothing more.

Communication is the basis for all relationships, and when communication dries up, you can be sure there is a problem. It is one of the signs she does not love you anymore.

2. She’s Avoiding You

If a woman is in love with you, she will want to spend time with you. She’ll initiate conversations, want to make plans, asks you to hang out, and show interest in your work.

She doesn’t have to be in contact 24/7, but she’ll prioritize your company over doing other things most of the time – that’s how it should be!

If she constantly excuses not to spend time with you, there’s a good chance she no longer loves you. And an excellent case. She’s prioritizing someone else over you.

You might think if she texts you constantly, she shows interest. She might enjoy talking to you, but that doesn’t mean she’s all that into you.

If she avoids meeting up and engaging with you on an intimate level, then you’re just one of her buddies.

3. She Criticizes You

Do you feel like you can’t do or say anything right?

If your partner constantly complains about you (and this has been happening for a while), you must examine yourself and take responsibility for your part.

However, if you determine she’s just on a criticism binge and nothing will please her, this is a sign she doesn’t love you.

When a woman checks out from a relationship, she’ll try to find more reasons not to be with you. She might not be doing this intentionally.

You can see the sign she does not love you anymore. If she’s no longer attracted to you, all the quirks she used to like are suddenly annoying qualities she wants you to change. All the activities she enjoyed with you now take up too much of her time.

4. The Respect Is Gone

Woman Yelling At Man
She doesn’t love you if she consistently disrespects your feelings, wishes, rights, values, ethics, morals, and traditions.

If you want to know if your partner loves you (or ever did!), consider how much respect she has for you.

She shows respect when showing genuine, honest, and sustained regard for her feelings, wishes, rights, values, ethics, morals, and traditions.

She will always respect these qualities if she loves you and never cross your boundaries. Looking at love and attraction from a woman’s perspective, it’s more about respect than love.

Are women attracted to men they don’t respect?


If you don’t have self-respect and healthy boundaries, or you’re terrified of loss and rejection, your woman won’t be attracted to youand probably won’t love you.

You might get icy apathy and indifference, flakiness, one-word texts, a short attention span, and pecks on the cheek.

5. Was It Just Infatuation?

Initially, she was probably infatuated with you, and that feeling can last a long time. Infatuation isn’t love because it isn’t sustainable.

For example, initially, if you have different values, she may pretend to have the same values. Eventually, she won’t be able to keep up the charade.

Once she is comfortable with you, you’ll notice inconsistencies. Even if she were on her “best behavior” to impress you, soon enough, the act would crumble.

Consider this: Maybe she was never genuinely in love with you. Instead, she stopped pretending to respect your feelings, wishes, rights, values, ethics, morals, and traditions.

Maybe she loved the idea of loving you, but that doesn’t last.

6. This Is a Pattern

She spends more time with her friends than husband
If you have a trusting relationship with her friends or family, consider asking them about her relationship history for clues about what’s happening now.

Ask friends or family members about her relationship history, and explore how she conducted herself (including exes).

You might discover disturbing behavior patterns that prompt you to end things with her. This step might not be possible, but it’s worth looking at her past relationships to see if there are patterns.

There are other signs to look for to determine she does not love you anymore.

7. She Asks for a Break

The number one mistake you can make if your partner asks for a break is to go along.

You might think giving her time and space is what she needs, but what ends up happening is the break is just an excuse to cushion the breakup.

The worst part is the “break” is probably an excuse to see other guys and line up a replacement.

Remember – no woman will ever want to break from a relationship she truly wants unless she has an excellent reason to do so. That reason might be that she no longer loves you.

8. She Doesn’t Care

If you’ve had bad breakups and rocky relationships, you know what a toxic connection feels like – constant arguing, cruel insults, and (maybe) passionate makeup sex.

This is not a fun experience! You might have felt betrayed, inadequate, and disappointed. Unfortunately, couples do this when they haven’t dealt with their baggage or healed emotional wounds. 

If she no longer cares, she probably:

  • has checked out emotionally (and in most other ways)
  • ignores most of what you say
  • no longer compliments you
  • makes lots of excuses
  • just generally avoids you
  • seems irritable and annoyed most of the time
  • avoids eye contact
  • is uninterested in sex
  • gives you one-word answers
  • offers quick pecks on the cheek
  • is icy and indifferent

Maybe your partner is behaving this way because she is depressed or has a problem completely unrelated to you. So, this situation might not be your fault, but denying or ignoring her behavior won’t change things.

9. She Has Lots of New Guy Friends

Woman Hanging Out With Group of Men
Becoming closer with male friends, and attracting new ones, is a sign that she’s seeking fulfillment from outside of the relationship.

If your partner is getting closer and closer to male friends (seemingly attracting them like flies to honey), there’s a reason for that.

Women typically adore male attention – platonic or otherwise – because it boosts their self-esteem and confidence.

Men and women can be close friends without romance, but it’s a red flag if your partner spends a lot of energy with guy friends.

Even if she never cheats, she’s seeking emotional validation, attention, and connection that she isn’t feeling with you.

Don’t turn into a jealous control freak or interrogate her. Just be aware that something might be up.

10. She’s Spending More Time With the Girls

Perhaps your partner spends more time hanging out with her girlfriends. Of course, you’re happy she has her own life and interests, and there’s nothing wrong with spending time with her girls.

She should maintain a healthy circle of girlfriends for the emotional support and entertainment you don’t provide as a man. You must encourage her to spend time with girlfriends and nurture those relationships.

These relationships can become a problem when her friends are toxic. They might influence her in negative ways – especially if alcohol is involved.

Is she influenced by their beliefs, choices, or habits?


She might even be trash-talking you and using them to vent about how awful you are. She might be lured in by the illusion of freedom she’s experiencing, partying with her girlfriends.

You can’t forbid her to have her own social life! Just be aware that if she’s spending more and more time with girlfriends and seems sulky and put off when she’s with you – it’s a sign she’s no longer in love with you.

11. She Avoids Most Physical Touch

One of the signs woman not loving anymore. Woman Pushing Man Away
If she pushes you away, acts annoyed, or looks disgusted during physical intimacy, she likely no longer loves you and is no longer attracted to you.

If you touch your partner, does she act annoyed?

Does she act like sex is an unpleasant chore?

Has she stopped touching you?

If your partner avoids your touch or touching you, it’s a sure sign she’s just not into you anymore and that your relationship may end.

12. She Flirts With Other Guys

If she’s cold and indifferent with you but sweet and seductive with other men – this is a red flag! Perhaps she’s playing games to get your attention or make you jealous, but if that is the case:

  • Why are you with her?!
  • Where do you draw the line?

If you get upset and call her out, she might accuse you of being controlling or insecure. This situation is one game you’ll probably lose – and it’s a sure sign she’s not in love with you.

Think about it – how would she react if you were flirting with other women?

Maybe it turns you on to watch her seduce other men. If not, her behavior probably makes you angry, disgusted, jealous, and uncomfortable. And these are normal reactions!

It’s time to move on because she doesn’t love you anymore.

13. She’s Much More Independent Than She Used to Be

She is letting you know that she doesn’t need you. She wants her own life and space.

When she loves you, she wants your help and advice – even if it is unneeded, she’ll allow you to support her in those ways. She appreciates your support.

If there is a sign she’s fallen out of love with you, she’ll act annoyed when you give her advice. Perhaps she’ll interpret every comment you make negatively.

14. She Avoids Discussions of Your Future Together

Woman Ignoring Man Trying to Talk to Her, warning sign of not being loved by a woman
If she seems to disengage and distract herself when you try to talk about the future, it’s possible that she doesn’t want to plan a future with you.

She now seems annoyed, disinterested, or disengaged when you bring up plans for the future or even talk about getting married.

Before, she loved making plans with you and contributed her thoughts. She was interested, excited, and attentive.

If she’s not in love with you, all she’ll feel is tension – or even revulsion – when discussing the future with you. You’ll see it on her face.

15. It’s All About Her

If your partner was always a bit “me first,” you may not notice a shift and attribute the change to her having a bad week. But if it’s all her, all the time, it can be a lot more than a temporary problem.

She may look at you as no longer part of the equation. You don’t matter.

And really – do you want to be with a woman who is self-centered at best or narcissistic at worst?

Narcissistic disorders destroy relationships. Watch out for the signs to see if your partner does not love you.

16. She Cheats on You

If she’s been unfaithful, there’s an excellent possibility she doesn’t love you anymore. It’s probably because women tend to cheat when they’re not in love anymore. Cheating is a loud and clear message that she no longer loves you. Suppose you are not sure of infidelity. There are ways to check.

17. You Know It

Depressed Man Contemplating Decisions, he sees signs of the woman not loving him anymore
After you’ve contemplated all of the key points in this article, you must learn to listen to your instincts and intuition. Where do you feel that this relationship is truly headed? Is there anything you can do to change the course?

Ignore the excuses you’re telling yourself to make your relationship seem better than it is. Ignore your partner’s excuses.

Take note of all the obvious signs you’re afraid to deal with because it might seem “easier” to stick it out. Forget about all the justifications and take a look at her actions.

What do you see, and what is your gut telling you?

When your instincts try to reach out and tell you things aren’t working, you might rationalize your inner voice and overthink or analyze the situation in your head. Your brain will make up all kinds of excuses.

Maybe, things have declined so slowly that it might be hard to notice how bad things are! But if your intuition is whispering that your partner doesn’t love you anymore, listen.

Don’t overthink; instead, watch her actions; you’ll have a clear answer in front of you all along. 

Wrapping Up

Now you know the signs that your partner no longer loves you.

If she checked out long ago, there probably isn’t much you can do other than end the relationship before you get dumped – or cheated on and then dumped.

Ultimately it will be up to you whether or not you want to try to change things for the better. And instead of trying to fix this broken relationship, focus on what you can do.

As painful as it is, your partner’s love for you has vanished, and it’s time for you to move on.

Now that you know all the warning signs of your woman no longer loving you, you can stop the endless worry, self-blame, or misery and focus on moving forward.

Falling into a negative hole, beating yourself up, or getting depressed won’t fix things with your partner.

No more arguing or begging. No more emotional reactions or desperate attempts to save the relationship. You don’t need your partner’s approval; you must act in your best interests.

You probably know what you need to do. 

There’s no need to be cruel or cold (even though she’s treated you poorly), but you must become independent enough to seek out what’s best for you. Gain back your self-respect and confidence.

And next time, make sure the woman you get serious with genuinely respects everything about you, accepts you as you are, and doesn’t try to change you or force things on you.

You’ll attract a woman who will love you – without the games.

All the warning signs will show you if the woman does not love you. You are worth much more; love yourself first, and remember you deserve to be loved.

Photo of author

Angela Doel

Angela M. Doel has researched and written about mental health problems that impact relationships, such as navigating divorce, rebuilding relationships, enhancing communication, and overcoming sex addiction. She published The Couples Communication Workbook: Therapeutic Homework Assignments to Foster Supportive Relationships (2020, Between Sessions Resources, Inc.).

14 thoughts on “17 Signs She Doesn’t Love You Anymore”

  1. After reading this, I realized so much thing about her.

    At first I tried to ignore the fact because I was so scared.
    But after reading this. I felt wiser.

    My only advice now is stop ignoring signs.

  2. I’ve never even felt this way to research anything on a relationship or anything in this nature . The first time ever implemented things that I learned from my past relationships to not be cold . This first time I’ve been this expressive about my feelings or have to feel I have to prove myself that’s only cus she is from a different state but it wasn’t like that in the beginning and I’m 32 . I cook I do clean after myself I make close to 100k a year I father her children which one is autistic both fathers not in the picture nor did I ever say they can’t just don’t chase them why because I co parent myself with my kids mother . I showed I’m secure I look pretty good I send her audios send her Uber eats when she at lunch the thinking of texts ain’t never stopped . Got flowers just cus it’s Monday . Damn near cook or go out to dinner and its always a bill. it’s like I get no credit . The first time I feel like This my Karma i guess .. I just got custody of my daughter and my fiancé was not welcoming my daughter is 13 and she felt that . Like my daughter like me advanced like check me and all cus I really wasn’t paying attention to my own kids cus I was there for hers and I was trying to find that balance. I hope anybody reading this as a real man don’t feel like this I feel crazy everybody understand what I’m saying but her . Like I left a whole relationship for you and she knew but right there that my red flag cus she have nothing now I helped her i don’t know but she treating me different. I even told her pops sounds crazy but thank god I’m seasoned and I have a daughter . Thank God she ran into me cus I helped her and not only that they’re some Wierdos that can harm your girls . We in miami now . But I feel like my job is done I was here for a season . The first time I feel good if I leave a relationship cus I never cheated don’t go out to strip clubs barely hang out and I moved from inner city of miami to the beach and the first I swear I damn near checked every box . I’m done

  3. Yea after reading this, i know I was right about my fiance who stopped loving me from day to day, after all weve built, after all what ive achieved for her, she just stopped loving me and turn away from me hoping we will stay friends. LoL. It hurts so much that I tried for suicide. It is about 3 months i guess? Still fresh, still dark thoughts, still cant accept it, still dont understand why. Nobody understand why. everyone are in shock. Only she is happy like she has never have any feelings.

  4. There are times that all I need is to hang out and talk about everything and show my care and love to that woman that makes me feel great. She is great in many ways and reading all this makes me wonder how sad can this be for those that are going through this. I once was in this situation and it really had me in a hard moment of my life, All I wanted to do was just forget about that person in every way but man it was hard. Now I’m doing ok with this new girl I’m with and I’m so blessed I left that person that was making my life horrible. It’s all about taking that next step and yes it won’t be that easy but you will find that right person that is worth all your love and time.

    • Bro it’s one thing to love a woman and loose her but to be in the same situation 20 years deep with 3 kids is hard my friend you dont just loose your family over night you loose your hole fkn life and with no where to go you end up in back of the car with no help from housing and no fkn savings were doomed for depression and whatever that leads too…still fighting and holding on tho hope we come out the other end to happines like you my friend

  5. After 32 yrs and 3 kids : she’s just avoiding me . This was our time and now nothing : retirement also in the mix : don’t understand what happened- she had a good life . Now I feel like a stranger in my own home .. kids grown and 2 gone … missing them too

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