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Tips for Having Healthy Disagreements

Couple arguing

Couple Arguing

Healthy way to handle disagreement


Conflict is always there in life. Some experience conflicts with people they never know, workmates, their instructors, friends, and even family members. Moreover, conflicts come out naturally at the time people interact.

Most people say conflict arises because of hurt feelings and anger, though it should not be this way. Also, when a person practices a healthy way of handling conflict, the process might build trust and support emotional growth.

Part of Brain

A healthy way of handling disagreement entails somebody getting out of their reptile brain, which is the part that controls someone’s automatic impulses-and gets into someone’s prefrontal cortex that enables the person to think rationally.

Stress Check

When people face disagreement, they should do quick stress check themselves. They should try their best to relieve the stress they are experiencing at the time by taking in a deep breath and check-in in with their emotions.


People are not supposed to allow their emotions to take control of them. When an individual needs time to correct themself, the best way is to take time. For people to manage disagreement, they must be able to notice their feelings, regulate themselves and ensure they are capable of communicating their needs.

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Tips for the healthiest way to deal with conflict

The healthiest way to deal with conflict is to use some helpful strategies.

A person should think it over through an honest assessment of the situation, a recommendation by U.S. Naval Academy psychologist and mentoring expert W.Brad Johnson, Ph.D.

They should consider the relationship’s problem and how you have contributed to it. The second strategy is to consult others; consultation is done by getting a range of perspectives from individuals the person consulting respects and trusts, which is an opinion by Linda, a Ph.D. professor of counseling psychology at the University of Oregon (DeAngelis).

When the grievance is very private to be raised in the department an individual works from, they should first tell those who are not in the same unit. Faculty in somebody’s program may be a better resource, mainly when they have functioned with their consultant and know the communication strategies that would work best for them.

A person should be prepared to talk with their adviser and think of what they want and how to say it. Keep in mind, blaming others is not the option. Nevertheless, people must say what is not working and be responsible for their contribution to the conflict.

Individuals should document their concerns, keep the paper in the trail, and even document a narrative of the discussion with/her adviser. The notes are supposed to be a factual statement on who committed which, day-without negative attributes, blame the faculty member. A person is even supposed to use grace. Following up is essential; requesting a new meeting if someone did not say all they needed on the first round. The last strategy is to avoid putting it off instantly.

3 Healthy responses to conflict

A healthy response to conflict is the ability to sympathize with other person’s views. These are the three health responses to conflict; calm, non-defensive, and respective reaction (Segal et al.,).

When individuals have these three responses, they are ready to forgive, forget, and do away with the conflict without being angry. These people have the love that prevents rejection, shaming, isolation, and abandonment. A person requires the ability to manage stress in a quick way when still calm and alert so that they can be able to resolve conflict successfully.

Controlling behavior and emotions make somebody able to communicate their needs without pushing and offering a threat to others. By avoiding disrespectful words and actions, a person can solve a problem quickly.

5 steps to solving a conflict in a healthy way

Step 1. Defining the cause of the conflict.

It gives more information on the cause of conflict, and those handling it can resolve it easily (AMA Staff). To acquire the information, someone must ask questions to identify the cause. The person handling the conflict should give both parties the part to share their side of the story.

Step 2. To look away from the event

What is important is not the circumstances but the viewpoint of the circumstances that caused the conflict.

Step 3. Suggest solutions

After getting each viewpoint, a person should ask both of them how they could change the situation.

Step 4. Identify solutions both disputants can cope with

Where somebody points out the merits of various ideas to benefit both parties.

Step 5 Agreement

Where both parties shake hands or hug and accept one of the alternatives in step 4.

Work cited

AMA Staff. " The Five Steps To Conflict Resolution". Amanet.Org,


DeAngelis, Tori. " Managing Conflict, The Healthy Way" Https://Www.Apa.Org,


Segal, Jeanne et al. "Conflict Resolution Skills – Helpguide.Org". Helpguide.Org,